Just Allow It

I felt this overwhelming urge to break the structure that I give myself. I started feeling like I was drowning in my to-do lists and I stopped enjoying it. I worked with my career coach today, not on more goals but on letting myself fail. Not chasing every rabbit of a beginning of an idea. I realized in our conversation that I race because I think I need to in order to keep the things I love.. I feel like I always have to be multitasking, working, moving, and thinking ahead because bad things come with stagnancy, If I stop, what if I never start again? My coach had me do a visualization where I talk to myself in the future. That future self was so calm and happy. She did all the things I’m doing now but she did them with an ease and levity that escapes me. I realized that I can be happy now. I can let go of the false belief that I need to keep expanding at a meteoric pace. I have this false belief that I need to be productive in order to be worthy. I write all the time about the power of just being. Maybe I write it in an effort to write in into me. Instead, I could just allow it. Not chase the racing thoughts. Just let go and allow.